Employee of the Month & Shrodinger's Cat

Every month we get an email about the employee of the month.  It has a nice picture attached that shows the recipient with his certificate and his chain of command.  Whenever I get the email, I always open the picture hoping that it will be me.  It never is.  People tell me I shouldn't have to look, but I am hoping for my own shrodinger's cat. 

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My Conspiracy Theories

1.  China is facing an imbalance in male/female ratios.  In about 10 years there is going to be a war for women.  The article says that for every 100 girls born there are 120 boys born.  Now multiply that by a billion people in China.  Yeah that is a lot of men with no prospect for a wife at all, let alone one that they find physically/mentally/emotionally attractive. 

2.  I like to call this my Crowded Room Theory.  Take a room of any size and start inserting people into it.  At some point the room will become noticably warmer with every person shoved in.  Now imagine that the earth is a room and we have over 6 billion people in it.  that is compared to  just under 2 billion in 1900.  We more than tripled how crowded the room was in about 100 years.  Could body heat be the culprit behind global warming.  

3.  Milk bottlers put a chemical in the milt to make it go sour after a few days to ensure that people are constantly buying their product.  The government lets this happen because the states get sales tax on every sale. 

Yes, they are a little cooky, but so am I.

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