Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Scare Tactics

ABC has a movie coming up called Avian flu or something like that.  This movie will be an over exaggeration of what will happen when the avian flu hits the U.S.  I have seen the previews and they are full of people wearing little masks and ransacking grocery stores as dead bodies pile up.  It is uncanny how closely this resembles the outbreak in other countries around the world. 

Avian Flu Facts:
The Avian flu killed more people last year than cancer, aids, and carnies combined.  Wearing your seatbelt reduces the chance of contracting avian flu.  The only cure for Avian flu is the tears of Chuck Norris, only Chuck Norris does not cry, ever.  The avian flu was bioengineered by the Penguin of Batman fame. 

Avian Flu Myths:
You can not get Avian flu from drinking wild turkey, although you still may die.  Crows feet are not an early symptom of avian flu.  Big bird has not infected the entire staff of Sesame Street.  KFC is still safe (they do not use chicken, they were actually sued and can't use the word chicken in their name, false advertising you know).  Eating bird droppings will not in fact immunize you from Avian flu.

Yes Avian flu will devastate America.  Just remember how bad SARS hurt us.

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gamany said...

you are so twisted.

Budd said...

Did I mess up the dates or did you find this in my backlog. I was adding posts from my blogger account, this is old. So, I have been twisted for some time.

gamany said...

what? it was on the first page of my neighborhood page. i didn't even notice the date. WOW. guess things were buggy on vox then.

grrrace said...

so, i guess i'm not the only one bringing back posts from the dead? judging from the date of this post...btw, my fave line is the chuck norris line. heh.